Sunday, January 4, 2015


It's been 17 days since I unexpectedly lost the love of my life.  It's been one week since I saw him for the last time... laying peacefully in a beautiful silver-gray casket, looking the same as he did when he used to lie next to me at night. A week since I last got to run my hand through his hair and tell him goodbye, making sure to send tears with him.  A week since my first time speaking at a funeral.

This was my eulogy.

My name is Erica, and I was Greg's.
I  haven’t been to many funerals, and I’ve never spoken at one before.
I’ve been lucky enough that up until now, the most tragic loss I’ve suffered was 4 months ago when my cat died suddenly and unexpectedly while I was here in Michigan, moving Greg in. I remember he held me as I lay in a heap on his empty apartment floor just after receiving the news. And here I had thought- this is the worst loss I could experience.  No.  This--- of all the people in all the world, there is no greater loss for me than Greg Reuter.

I met Greg almost 4 years ago. It was clear right away that he was going to play a very special role in my life.  We were immediately drawn to each other, and over the years we formed a bond unlike anything I’ve ever shared with another person.

Greg easily and quickly became my mentor, my best friend, and eventually the love of my life. More so than all of that, he was my rock, Keeping me grounded in a world that is often too overwhelming for me.

For years, Greg was my everything.  We spoke every single day and there was absolutely nothing I couldn’t tell him. I’ve lost count of the amount of times and different ways that Greg has been there for me. I worked hard to do the same for him.

I am so blessed to have shared the love with Greg that I did. I was truly enamored with him, and got to see sides of him no one else did. But through our many ups and downs one thing was always certain- my heart was his, and I loved him so much. No one has ever made me feel more beautiful or cherished than Greg. He loved me in the unconditional way I had always hoped for.
He was so gentle and comforting when life called for it- he had this light touch, I called it his super touch, that he would rub my back with when I was upset and instantly, everything would be better. THAT is what Greg did- he made Everything BETTER.

Perhaps one of the biggest impacts Greg made on my life, was through his belief in me. It’s a tough business we’re in, and I was star struck by Greg from the start. 8 Broadway Shows?!  It was astounding.
  Here was this man with so much success and experience, what business did I have associating myself with him?  And yet- for whatever reason, Greg became laser-focus fixated on my ability, and obsessed with bringing out the best in me. Over and over he expressed his belief in me- he was so fervent in his expression.  He wasn’t the first person to tell me that he thought I could succeed---
But he was the first person to FINALLY make me BELIEVE IT.

With Greg by my side, cheering me on, I finally (after 4 years of struggling) started to find success.  Every accomplishment I’ve had these past 4 years has been because of Greg Reuter. And he was there for every single one of them, to hold me tight and say “I told you so.”
Aside from my parents, I’ve never had anyone express such pride for me. No one on Earth has ever made me feel as valuable as Greg did.
He dedicated his last few years to helping me succeed, he was the biggest champion for me, and I simply would not be where I am or who I am today without him.

For every success there were of course dozens of failures.  And through each one, Greg was there to pick me back up. I called him on at LEAST a monthly basis to cry about wanting to quit. The last time I did so was 2 weeks ago.
And for the thousandth time he repeated his mantra: “I will not let you give up. I know you’ve got what it takes. We are going to make this happen for you. I BELIEVE IN YOU.” No one has ever said those 4 words more or made me believe them like he did.

And now, I HAVE to go on and do it for him.  I honestly don’t know how to do it without him, but I cannot give up until I prove him right. And I KNOW he is going to still be there every step of the way. If I know Greg, and the way he always wanted to be by my side, I have to believe that he has found his way to be here now. His influence on me will continue, and he will be in every note of every song that I sing and in everything I do, now and forever. I will continue spending my life working to make him proud.

He was the light of my life, and my world is darker without him. But I am so grateful to have shared part of my life with him, his love is one of the greatest blessings I’ve ever received. I am better for it, and I will cherish what we had forever.

I promise you babe… I will keep going for you.  Everything from here on out is for you. Thank you for touching my life, for showing me real love, for believing in me and for making me better. I love you and miss you forever. 

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